Children thrive in a predictable rhythm and routine. We see their anxiety lessen when they know what to expect. When meals and bedtime happen regularly , it anchors their day. Once established, it is helpful to find other aspects of the day that you can commit to making happen regularly. Homeschool is, of course, a source of rhythm for your child. Although these days, school can be somewhat unpredictable as well, giving us even more reasons to fill moments in your child’s day with heartfelt connection and a sense of calm. Children are like sponges, absorbing the energy around them. It is important as the parent to be aware of the energy you are allowing into the home space. For example, if you listen to the news, know that even if it looks like your child is quietly playing in the other room, they are still absorbing the energy of the stories. Low-grade anxiety can seep into their being. As much as I did my best to protect my children from the onslaught of doomsday news when they were little, I knew I couldn’t stop it entirely. It became essential for me to hold consistent space for them each day, which instilled the values I wanted them to have. I found that the evening ritual was my best time to hold this space. Children take in a lot of information and many experiences throughout their day that they can’t easily process. At night, when they are lying in bed, winding down, things often come to the surface. They can then share a painful experience they had in their day, a moment of confusion, or a story that happened. Setting aside this evening time for your child means that you are not in a rush to get somewhere. Your child feels your entire presence with them, and you can continue fostering a heartfelt connection. As a mother, I find that as my days are busy and I get pulled in many directions, I know that I can still give my children my attention and focus in the evenings. Whether it is for 5 minutes or 25 minutes, the point is that they have my undivided attention and can feel this and settle into it. When my children were young, I decided to offer them an evening verse, a verse I would say with them every evening to instill my values and build a foundation for them of spiritual knowing and trust in the unseen world that I feel is around us. I chose to refer to God because this word speaks to me of the unknown spiritual wonder around us, regardless of any one religion. I decided to use the word angel because it speaks to me of the unseen spiritual support I feel we are graced by. I made up this simple verse: Thank you, God, for making my day, Thank you, angels, for guiding my way. I began saying it with my children when they were 2 and 3 years old, and today they are 14 and 15 years old, and I still say it with them each night. It brings me a sense of peace that I have offered my children a feeling of wonder for the world in a gentle and consistent way. As teenagers, out in the world, they are exposed to all kinds of contradictory views about the world. Yet, the words they hear and feel right before falling asleep are words that align with what I want them to feel about this wonderful earthly experience. I encourage you to consider your values and whether you have a spiritual view, you want to share with your children. What kinds of words would you like to have your child hear and feel each night while they live under your roof? Perhaps you feel comfortable writing your own verse to recite with them. Below I offer three evening bedtime songs or verses I wrote for families with young children. Please use any of these, including the one above that I have used with my children for many years. Bedtime Songs & VersesSettling down in my cozy bed Thoughts are quiet in my head The sun has set The stars are bright It's time to sleep now for the night Settling down in my cozy bed Thoughts are quiet in my head Throughout the day I did my best to shine my heart from east to west The sun has set The stars are bright It's time to sleep now for the night The ducklings snuggle into their nests The kittens purr so softly The puppies lay so close together The cubs so tired yawn And I, with my heart so full of love Sleep now from dusk to dawn Thank you for the gifts of the day May they shine brighter and be remembered more often tomorrow Sleep comes to me my body settles into stillness my spirit soars with the stars Night and Day Sleep and Wake In and Out Moon and Sun I close my eyes and trust the rhythm of life Closing the day, each evening, with your heartfelt presence and an evening verse, is a way to show up for your child consistently and to instill a sense of wonder and trust in a world that may be lacking both. - Jennifer Ross
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